Hang On To What Is Lovely

“I’ve knelt there,
and so have you,
hanging on
to what you love,
to what is lovely.
The lake’s
shining sheets
don’t make a ripple now,
and the stars
are going off to their blue sleep” - Mary Oliver 

Today I finally deactivated my husband’s cell phone and then unexpectedly burst into tears while taking to the Verizon agent. I should have done it sooner, but couldn’t do it for all the reasons. I guess I should have know the tears would come again. Grief creeps up on you that way.

Today is warm and so I took my son fishing right after school because the lake is good medicine for us both and we need to soak in all the beauty of this place.

I fell asleep and forgot to watch for the meteors last night. Did you see any?

Wholeheartedly Exhausted

“ how I want to know
that sun,
and how I want to flower
and how I want to claim
my happiness
and how I want to walk
through life
amazed and inarticulate
with thanks.”- David Whyte

I’ve been thinking about all of you and the way you spend your week endings. Yesterday we joined my friend Terri at the Icelandic Christmas Bazarre. It was good to get away for the afternoon. I have a thing for Iceland, tho I’ve never been there. It was a smaller event than we had anticipated, but every once in a while I could hear the language spoken and it made me swoon. I love the sound of that ancient tongue. There were photos and sweaters, and beads made from lava. It was a feast for the eyes. On the way home, the sun was setting and the sky was the color of Easter eggs. When we arrived home, we went on the deck to watch the sun dip low and the clouds blanket the valley. It never gets old.

David Whyte once said that the antidote to exhaustion is wholeheartedness. And I wish to tell him that grief is wholeheartedly exhausting, but I suspect he knows that, and the way the broken heart remains whole nevertheless...