Principles!

So we have a pair of these Groucho Glasses and Satch makes us wear them all the time. If we try to get out of it, he cries, and if we wear them...he laughs at us. He took the nose off, and then the fluffy eyebrows. Now Robert and I walk around looking like Drew Carey.

" Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others." - Groucho Marx

Lead in Lunch Boxes

I read recently that the FDA issued a letter to manufacturers of vinyl lunchboxes concerning the presence of lead which can be transferred to your child's food or hands after touching the lunchbox interior.

Here's a link to various news reports regarding lunchboxes containing lead.
And here's how you can have your child's lunch box tested!

The Squirt

This is what happens if I leave the room... on Vimeo

I left the room for a moment and returned to find Satch kneeling on the kitchen table, meowing like a cat and squirting the water bottle. Oh he's quick alright...like lightning. (The cats ran for cover)

Have a good weekend everyone!!!

Welcome Sanai

I would like to take this moment to welcome baby Sanai to our planet. Congratulations to Hollie and Lyndel for bringing a beautiful new soul into the world yesterday.

Words can't describe the joy I feel to know, that she's here!

Climb Every Sofa

He loves climbing...the sofa, chairs, steps. He loves that, at bedtime, dada lets him turn off the light, then carries him to the window to look at the moon and stars and lights. And recently I began using my book light to make hand shadows on the wall before we go to sleep. I only know a few, but inspired by this, I'm buying this for our bedtime book basket!

Happy Valentine's Day!

And did you get what you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.

- Raymond Carver

Some vintage clip art here!

A Wash

I have this mothering motto...
when all else fails, just add water.








Entranced by the water faucet, he'll stand there until his fingers are puckered.
















And no matter how long I let him wash his hands,













there is always drama when it's time to dry off.

A playful artist/mama by the name of Cordelia (whom I met on the trails one day) told me, "it's all about transitions...transitions can be difficult even for adults". I make the transitions as gentle as possible with plenty of discussion about what happens next. I also try to take as much time as he needs, but sometimes there is drama no matter what I do.

What wisdom can you share about transitions?

Snow Day

The snow and sunshine was oh so luring. I found my old wool tights, the ones with holes in the toes that I've restitched many times, and began layering myself, then dressed Satch. I threw a sherpa fleece in the bottom of the sled and sat Satch upon it. The sled once my own, now belongs to Satch...a sled that traveled the best slopes in Central Park: the hill near Belvedere Castle and Cedar Hill. The word, "Paris" is embossed on the front which always makes me think of my friend, Fanchon, whom we plan to visit.

The earth was hard and frozen despite the green tufts of grass and daffodil stems that sprouted from it in small patches. Even the english ivy that edged the trail crackled beneath us sounding more like ice than foliage. We could hear the squeals of delighted children in the distance and the snow muffled sound of my foot steps as I pulled Satch in the sled behind me.













Satch tasted the snow! I asked him if it tasted good and he replied, "brrrrr"!

The lake was almost completely frozen, except for a small oval at the far end dotted by geese and ducks, some of whom were resting along the ice bank. If I squinted through the fog of my breath, the ice looked like a wet sandy beach and suddenly I was reminded of how much I miss the ocean. I grew up on the south shore of Long Island in a town located on the Great South Bay, where one could easily hop on a ferry to Fire Island, a barrier island with beautiful beaches along the Atlantic Ocean. Robert and I vow to bring Satch to the ocean this summer.

Until then...may our toes be warm and our hats in style!

Eh Oui!

Chocolate filled croissant...'nough said!

The B Side

He nursed while I watched his eyelids grow heavy and his body relaxed in my arms. I laid him on the sofa beside me and surrounded him with pillows. I turned the cd player on and played a vintage recordings of the "Winnie the Pooh" and "Peter Pan" to ensure sweet and adventurous dreams. He napped for only 30 minutes, barely enough time to read a few more chapters of "The Mermaid Chair".

Last night as I nursed him, I fought hard against the sleepines brought on by oxytocin and the fatigue of motherhood and after he dozed off, I rolled over, clipped on the owl light, took a few gulps of water and read my book. I felt like I was a child again, hiding under the covers after bedtime with a flashlight so that I could sneak a few more chapters of Roald Dahl without being caught, only I'm a "grown-up" now and reading a book without pictures. When he began to stir, I clicked off the light and snuggled in next to him.

And this is how it has come to be...grasping for a few moments to do things that I enjoy, a few moments to find myself. I want to be upbeat and say that toddlerhood is challenging, but "difficult" is more apt. And there are days when nothing pleases him...when he is so demanding that I am unable to shower...days when I lose my patience, lose my grip, raise my voice, and feel guilty about it...feel like I totally suck at being a mom. Today was one of those days.

When he is in one of his moods, he will begin the day whining. It's a sound like I've never heard before...a sound so shrill and horrid that I am pretty sure it could induce seizures in laboratory animals. It is truly disorienting!

Has anyone had this experience?

I look forward to the day when he can amuse himself for more than a few minutes and I keep reminding myself that we DO have some good days: days when we laugh, sing, and play; days without whining, crying, or hurting mama; days when I can shower and nights when I lose myself in a chapter and find myself snuggling in the moonlight with my baby.

Tomorrow is Saturday and that means I am guaranteed a shower while dada plays with Satch.

What Hands Can Do!

I don't know about you, but I'm inspired to do something like this for Satch one day.
(Thanks, Tina!)

Mom to Mom: Shelley Krause

It's February, and it is with great pleasure that I introduce you to....

Mom: Shelley
Of: D, born on 9/3/01
("Five and a third" as I write this)
Where: NJ
Blog: But Wait, There's More!






1. In what ways has becoming a mother changed you?

As soon as I opened myself up to the possibility of parenting,
I could feel the changes start. I spent the length of my pregnancy
practicing patience, because I knew myself well enough to know
that those muscles were going to need to be in MUCH better shape
once a small someone joined our family. There's still room for
growth, but I've definitely gotten better. Since becoming a mother
I have also become much more politically active. I carry in my
heart this image of my almost-grown son asking me questions like,
"What did you do about the war in Iraq?" or "Did you ever do anything
about AIDS, mom?" Who knows if we'll ever have those conversations,
but I feel this intense responsibility to live into my expressed values
now, to "walk the walk." I am more willing to say "no," and more
aware in general of time as a precious, non-renewable resource.
I don't listen to the radio anymore in the mornings, because I can't predict
when the next utterance of "roadside bomb" or "suicide bomber" might
be, and I don't want those phrases in D's head. I spend much less time
in retail space now than I did in my pre-parenthood years, again because
I don't want that to be a significant part of D's childhood. I am
simultaneously proud and humbled that I gave birth. Sometimes now, for
fun, when a healthcare person is apologizing for a needle stick or some
such, I'll look at them and say, "Please. I gave birth." I love that.

So much has changed. I am more in love with my partner,
and with life in general, because of D's inadvertent role as the
daily bringer of wonder and goofiness into our lives.
I look at adolescent boys completely differently (might ours turn
out like that one?). I am constantly running on two clocks: mine,
and his. I have largely let go of the concept of sleeping in. My
television-watching has dwindled to almost nil. I spend more
time at the public library, but less time reading. I think nothing
of finishing off leftover whatever. Oh wait... that was true before. :-)

2. What is one tip you would like to share about mothering?

Judge not, lest ye be judged. Seriously, moms are so invested
in their decisions (midwife or doctor, homebirth or hospital,
breastfed or bottle, on-demand or scheduled feedings, cloth
or store-bought or no diapers, co-sleeping or crib sleeping,
uncut or circumcised, TV or no, video games or no, and
the list goes on and on) that the path to holier-than-thou-itude can be
super-short. If you start choosing up sides you'll find out pretty
quickly how lonely life can be. By the same token, I think it's
important to decide early on what things you will not "up with put," as
my father would say, and commit to sticking to them. External
influences can be very hard to resist.

(My non-blogging life partner's answer to this is so fabulous that I
have to share it: "Say 'yes' reflexively, and 'no' selectively.")

3. What is your creative outlet/medium?

I blog, sing, teach high school students, bake, co-write
nonsense songs with my son, whip out my camera at a
moment's notice, and write essays, poetry, and a
teensy bit of fiction.

4. How do you find time for creativity?

Stolen moments, mostly. I ignore the mess that is our house,
and my partner's pre-sleep routine takes longer than mine.
I pathetically eat lunch in my office while hunched
over my laptop (but no crumbs in the keyboard, I swear!).
I've also lately been "swapping out" listening to the news on the
way to work in favor of writing haiku... at least some mornings!

5. Why do you blog/journal?

I started blogging when I was making the shift back to
waged work after spending three years mothering our son
at home. It was a way to keep my friends au courant with
my search without having to slog through the depressing
(at least at the beginning) details. Then I discovered that blogging
is a great way to chronicle the little things you think you'll remember
but in fact probably won't. Plus, as a natural extrovert and ham,
I like the idea of having an "always on" presence in the world that
enables people to connect with me on their own terms, as their lives
and schedules permit. I love that strangers and I can find each other
and discover that we are actually members of the same tribe.
Finally, I have recently found, with prompts like those at One Deep Breath,
Mama Says Om, and Sunday Scribblings, that blogging has become
a way to reaffirm my sense of myself as a writer. So the list of reasons
is a moving but growing target.

6. Which blogs do you frequent?

Right now, I'm grooving on Sassafras Mama, a wrung sponge,
GenreCookShop, and Beyond the Fields We Know.
I check in on brainhell almost every day to see how he's doing.
And ze frank's daily video blog has become "my
show..." I even helped get the Running Fool across the
country.

7. Who are some bloggers that you would like to meet?

Other than you, Wendy? :-)
I'd actually love to meet everyone who's ever posted a
kind, thoughtful, odd, or funny comment at But Wait, There's More!,
and I'd love to meet just a few of the other people to whom I feel
indebted: Keri Smith of WishJar Journal, Patti Digh of 37days,
Susan and Jennifer of One Deep Breath, Stefan Bucher of DailyMonster,
Dana and Liz Elayne of Poetry Thursday, and all the wonderful people
who are pouring their time and talent out into the deepening ocean of
gifts that the blogosphere has become for me.

Whew. That was fun. Thanks for listening.

* My apologies for the odd line breaks. Blogger seems to have a bit of a bug. Text is correct in preview, but posts wonky. - Wendy